I was at Walgreens the other day and I noticed that the young woman who rang up my birthday card, shampoo and toothpaste was wearing a name tag that read:
Susan, Beauty Consultant. I also noticed that Susan had chipped electric blue fingernails, multiple rings on all of her fingers, mellow yellow teeth, too many piercings that were visible and my guess is that she also had too many more that weren’t as well. I looked at her tag again and thought, “Hmm, I wonder if I should consult with her on that nagging beauty question that I have.” Then I looked at her fingernails again when she held out her hand to take my money and told me the total amount of my purchase in between the click clicking of her chewing gum, and I thought, “Nah, I’ll seek a consultation elsewhere.”
I was watching a commercial the other day for a local furniture store, and the staff, instead of being referred to as sales associates, were referred to as design consultants. My guess is that the likelyhood that any of these consultants attended design school is pretty slim. What type of design would that be, designing a methodology for getting me to buy a chair from them?
I went into a store to return something and noticed that instead of a customer service desk, they had a “guest services” desk. Apparently I am no longer considered a customer in the store, I am now a guest. Does that mean they’ll serve me a nice homemade dinner with a glass of wine or put me up in a fully appointed room for the night? Really, I just wanted to return a t-shirt.
Consultants, Designers, Guests. I’m getting confused, but have come to realize that there are designers and “designers,” there are consultants and “consultants,” and there are guests and “guests.” Just in case you all are wondering, I’m a writer not a “writer.”